Tuesday 13 January 2015

An Indian's guide to living in America

Follow the following guidelines only if you are Indian and living in America on a work permit:

(Tourists do what you want to do,as long as you don't murder anyone; in case of which you will earn a one way ticket back to Motherland all free of cost)

  1. The spices you find in the USA are not as spicy as you find in India.(Patel Brothers the grocery store all Indians flock to in times of the masala crisis)
  2. If you are living in NYC or LA you can get off with a lack of street etiquette but not in Southern countries;its still trendy to greet someone you meet on the road.
  3. If you are vegetarian, then be prepared to accept eggs as a part of vegetarian diet or stuff yourself with pasta and salad as your sole options.
  4. Learning to cook a few basic dishes won't kill you.( For those who can't YouTube and Pinterest are always there for you)
  5. Be ready to spend your income on taxes ( yes, everything is taxed;heavily)
  6. For any small purchase be prepared to stand in long queues in Walmart.(And the good news is Walmart has only three cash registers out of 25 at any given point of time)
  7. Be prepared to walk,talk,drink and eat all at the same time i.e. Morning time. (Dunkin' Donuts/Starbucks your morning saviour unless you can whip up a power packed nutrition punch of scrambled eggs and toast, just like that!!)
  8. Internet speeds are fast enough for watching movies online. ( and there being no dearth of pirated movie sites you can catch up on the latest flicks- Hollywood and Bollywood alike)
  9. If you are in a relationship with someone in India, get ready to give it up or make up with sleepless nights.
  10. Lastly,the most important one- Rewrite your own rules.