Getting used to America

America is a strange land for people coming from the Eastern part of the world. Thanks to globalization,this strange feeling of being in a strange world has been diluted to a great extent. This doesn't make us Easterners feel like aliens out here in the land of Spider-man and Batman, but living here sure feels much different from home.

HOW AMERICA(ns) IS(are) DIFFERENT FROM INDIA(ns) :

Well basically people are pretty much similar all over the world. They love hanging out with family and friends, hate going to work on Mondays, are ecstatic when the weekend draws near, try to put in a lot of efforts into making marriages work(yes they do,as against all claims made by Hollywood rom-coms),love shopping (even bargain hunting and discount sales),have money crunches at the end of the month etc. But there are some pointers which set them apart from us Indians :

1. COURTESY                                                                                                                                     No matter which supermarket you happen to visit or the restaurant you frequent you are always greeted with a "hello, how are you doing?" which is awkward for an Indian as its very unusual for anyone to greet passers by or people walking on the road just because you happened to make eye contact with them.(whereas you were actually staring at them trying to figure out who he or she is)
   
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     
2. Obsession with APPLE products                                                                                                          Apple is considered as The Holy Grail of all mobile and electronic products. Everyone is a blind follower without considering the multi functionality of what Android has to offer. Though many of them may not even have a justification of why they use the same Apple seems like the national product of the USA.
   
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      
3. TANNING                                                                                                                                         It's difficult to find OTC fairness products at Walmart or any other pharmacy or supermarket for the basic reason that Americans are obsessed with getting a tan. Basically it is just Indian habits in the reverse. Indians are driven by their craze to look fair, which is their idea of beauty. "The grass is always greener on the other side" and its human tendency to want to possess what you don not have.Having a tan is as important as having a summer ready bikini bod.And if you are Indian you will get constantly complimented for the colour of your skin being exotic.
   
                                                                                                                          
4. CREDIT CARDS                                                                                                                             Americans love buying on credit because that is the way they build up their credit score. Read more about it here  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Credit_score  .Any major asset such as a four wheeler or a house majorly affects the score in a positive manner if you pay the installments well on time. Most of the people here live for the day and make no qualms about having savings accounts. No wonder the country has a rising debt problem.
   
                                                                                                              
5. TIPPING in restaurants                                                                                                                  Yes!! whether you like it or not you have to tip the waiter/waitress for every meal you have at a restaurant. Sounds crazy? But the service which is provided mostly at restaurants compels you to do so. Mostly the tips are included in the bill and if not, there is provision for that in the bill. So you do end up paying at least a dollar or two(minimum) excluding your meal amount. And no you cant forget to do so because you will have the person waiting upon you rush after you at the restaurant demanding an explanation for not giving tips.( and no, acting like you have forgotten to pay doesn't work, Trust me, I did try that one).  
   
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   
6. TRADITIONAL DAYS                                                                                                                      Halloween and Thanksgiving along with the 4th of July are the most important festivals in the country which share a position of importance with Christmas. Though most of America is way ahead of more than half the world in terms of modernity it is still grounded with fierce patriotism and old school traditions which makes it endearing. Its refreshing to see the youth talk about the country with a sense of self belonging. The coming together of the family for the traditional dinner of stuffed turkey and mashed potatoes melts my heart every time.
   
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             
7. SPICY FOOD                                                                                                                                   The most amount of spice that an average American can take is the Buffalo sauce which tastes like smoked tomato ketchup. Tacos from Taco Bell can actually set their asses on fire. No matter how spicy you ask for a dish to be made in an American diner or restaurant it can't match the fire offered by Indian eateries.(works fine with me as I am not much of a spice lover but I do miss the yummy Indian fare) But definitely its the cheese in every dish that bothers me and I have developed a serious aversion for cheese after landing here.
   
                                                                                                                                
8. WEEKENDS                                                                                                                                    I haven't seen any person wait as eagerly for the weekend as the average American. The weekend is a mini vacation to go camping (spending money to live like a homeless person) or cross country driving or many other such activities. But the point is Americans love the outdoors as much as they love their comforts and seek adventure in living out in the woods or an RV all by themselves like primitive men fishing by the lake and cooking up a scrumptious meal by a fire (started from scratch using twigs or stones). No! I am not kidding or making up stories.  
   
                                                                                                                                                        
9. FOOTBALL, BASEBALL and BASKETBALL                                                                            Football in America means Rugby. Soccer is almost non-existent. The craze that India has for the ICC Cricket World Cup can be easily compared to America's love for the Super Bowl, so much so that you have top pop artistes and singers performing at the halftimes of these games.If you don't want to watch the games its alright, you can just watch the commercials at halftime they are just as entertaining as the real game.
                                                                     Moreover its only the USA that follows the NFL (National Football League).                                                                                             
   
                                                                      
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        
10. PETS                                                                                                                                                  Animals kept as pets are treated as a member of the family. They are pampered and looked after and cared for like a child.I have seen dogs and cats clothed in the winters in India as well but the picture below will prove to you that pets are treated as ROYALTY in America.     NOTE : Pets not just include cats and dogs but also pigs,rats,lizards,hamsters,birds,squirrels etc.
    
    

To round it all up America is much more than what a Hollywood movie will show you(that includes NYC being attacked by aliens or by any other evil superpower). People here are very optimistic and hard working at whatever they do.They have immense faith in the ability of the nation and are boisterously proud and vocal of their love for the country. They rise together when any calamity hits the nation and work towards it.

If you have anything to add feel free to do so in the comments section and please provide any feedback (negative or positive) to me!!(not to someone else) And do share and subscribe if you like it..

Growing older... Probably wiser..

"If you never did crazy things when you were young you will never have stories to tell when you grow old."

Change is inevitable. Change happens in people and places. In the same people over a long period of time. If there is something or someone who claims to have not changed then that person/thing has been deprived of much needed improvement. We have heard of old tales from our grandparents about their good old days and how they think that age was better than the new one. Probably they fail to understand that it is the New Age or generation that has kept them alive. As much as we would like to criticize youngsters over their choices we some how fail to perceive that we were standing in the same place a few years ago and we would react in the same way had we been in the current situation.
That is because we were young, stupid , crazy, reckless and impulsive in the same way. But should we look back and think if we should regret all those things that we did....  The answer is NO!

Had I not done any of the things I did I wouldn't have been even half of the person that I am today..

Here's a list of things that I learned in the past 25 years :

1. LOVE yourself first.                                                                                                                          Pamper yourself. Why? Because you are worth all that care. What you consume now will decide the fate of your health over the next 25 years. Make sure your body gets the right amount of nutrition along with your brain.Exercise,read and travel and keep an open approach.
   
                                                                                                                                                    
2. FORGIVE yourself for your mistakes.                                                                                              You wouldn't be the person you are without making the mistakes that you have. I have made countless ones.Often you learn a lot but its difficult to move on with all that guilt.I have often wished so badly for a time machine for these very moments where I could just disappear from the gaze of the world.Unless you make peace with yourself, it'll be difficult for you to move on with your life. No one in this world is perfect everyone is as broken as you are.                                                                                                                                   
                                                                                            
3. Do not base your DECISIONS based on the advice of those who don't have to face the results.                                                                                                                                         Each one turns into an expert when the problem is not theirs'. Remember that very few of them actually are genuinely concerned,the rest are just curious and are probably glad that you have them.
   
                                                                                                    
4. CAREER SWITCHES are fine.                                                                                                        It is absolutely fine to change from the career that you started with to a different one.I switched from Teaching to Management and it does make me feel better. As a teenager most are forced to pick a career based on what their parents think is best for them. The reasons could be myriad - ranging from economic problems,parental pressures to even peer pressures.Regret is the only feeling we will be clinging to if we are not bold enough to make decisions for ourselves and realize our full potential and pursue our dreams.
                                                                                                                                                                                               
5. FACEBOOK is virtual and not your real life.                                                                                 Everything you do and everywhere you go doesn't have to necessarily be a part of Facebook. It's even more ridiculous to post elaborate messages declaring your love for your spouse on your wall when its much more practical to just wish them in person which would take less time, energy and efforts.Most of the friends you have there are largely acquaintances and not people whom you know on a personal level. Had they known you there wouldn't be a furore every time you end up explaining "so-called controversial status".
                                                                                                                                                                                     
6. CHANGE is inevitable.                                                                                                                       There are different phases of your life. Childhood. Teenage. Adulthood. You have different interests at different stages of your life. As a teenager I would prefer listening to a lot of grunge, metal and hard rock bands. Guess it had a lot to do with the angst and rebellious attitude you have as a teenager. (though I still enjoy watching Duck Tales,and I am not embarrassed about it). You have to accept the fact that you will change and that's A-ok. You are not expected to be the same from birth till death. That same change will turn you from a measly little caterpillar to a beautiful full grown butterfly.
   
                                                                                                                     
7. Be CRAZY.Be YOU.                                                                                                                        You are irreplaceable. No one can do what you do and how you do. The day you realize this you wouldn't have to conform with any ideas of being perfect or normal. Because when you conform you lose yourself.And the moment you lose yourself in a crowd you cannot stand out.Be different. Embrace you awkwardness. As its said "what makes you different;makes you beautiful.
   
8. Your FAMILY will always understand you and vice versa.                                                              A tight close knit family is the fabric of existence. The only ones to stand up for you when the whole world goes against you is your family. The most misunderstood people in your teenage are your PARENTS. They are genuinely worried and concerned about your well being. As far as possible they try their best to shield you from the snares of the world. We only come to realize this as we cross into our 20s. Keep them close to you for the rest of their lives because what they did for you was probably the best they could.
                                                                                                 
9. Have a few but REAL FRIENDS.                                                                                                      Friends are an extension of our family outside our home. A friend is someone who has good things to say about you behind your back.Though you can appear to be friendly to the whole world its just a handful of people with whom we make a connection which can be carried all the way till we grow old. Friends are not made by basing it upon what they can do for you. Its not necessary to talk to them everyday or text them everyday. But they are the first people you celebrate your success with and the first ones when you need to vent out. If you have at least one such person in your life then consider yourself lucky.
   
                                                                                                              
10. APOLOGIZE and FORGIVE.                                                                                                          The one who apologizes is the bravest and the ones who forgives is the strongest. Harboring age old grudges over a period of years is immature and does no good to anyone. The quicker you are to forgive the more healthier is your relationship with that person. Everyone makes mistakes and "its human nature to make mistakes". Had we not been defaulting then everyone would be wearing halos on their heads.It is easy to judge people for their mistakes but difficult to recognize one's own.If you are at fault then it also makes sense to correct it to the best of your abilities.
    
    
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              
11. KEEPING EVERYONE HAPPY is not humanly possible.                                                             Everyone is bound to be offended by you at one point or the other. It is up to you to choose to make everyone happy. If they know you they will never question you because "dogs don't bark at people they know". Making people happy at the cost of your own should not be an option.
    
    
                                                                                                                                                                                                                              
12. You cannot CHANGE PEOPLE.                                                                                                     As you are unique so are each of the entire living human population on this planet. Even a set of twins has a different set of fingerprints. No two people are the same, What sets them apart from each other makes them irreplaceable in your life.If you hate a person because he drinks alcohol or smokes there are people who maybe hating you for the way you are. Just because a person isn't like you doesn't make him/her a bad person. It doesn't make sense to try to change and mould the person according to your needs. Love them for what they are.
    
    
                                                                                                                                                                                             
13. Live in the PRESENT.                                                                                                                    Benjamin Franklin said:"You can be certain of only two things : DEATH and TAXES." (one a more serious note)It isn't sensible to give up enjoying the present just to postpone it for the future. Many people save for a rainy day which is perfectly acceptable. But not being able to savor the present owing to future investments because "today is a gift and that's why they call it PRESENT".
    
    
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   
14. Being SINGLE is a choice. Not an option.                                                                                   Just because everyone else is committed or getting married and posting pictures of their wedding or honeymoon doesn't mean you have to do that as well. It is not a race. You don't have to jump on to the bandwagon just because it is in fashion. Being committed can be commitment to work or to yourself or to any hobby or passion which makes you really happy. It doesn't always mean that you are not fit to be in a relationship.It means that you are committed to make your life the way you have thought it out.
    
    
                                                                                                                               
15. Life is not FAIR.                                                                                                                                When you set out in the Big,Bad World no one is there to protect you and take care of you.You are out there fending for yourselves on your own. The world is like a jungle and runs on the eternal law "survival of the fittest". 
    
    
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          
16. You can't change what PEOPLE THINK OR SAY about you.                                                     If you start thinking what people think about you, then what will people do?? It isn't your job, to think what people might say about you. Because no matter what you do or say PEOPLE ARE GOING TO TALK. 
    
    
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            
17. Take RISKS.                                                                                                                                     Higher rate of risk = higher returns .Take risks , Take chances. If you succeed you will achieve your goal and if you fail you will have gained EXPERIENCE.
    
    
                                                                                               
18. Ask for HELP when you need it.                                                                                                       You cannot do anything on your own.If you are given a team then make use of it. Delegate your work. Organize it. Prepare a time table, if needed.And if you do not understand something ask for help and understand it so that you are not stressed over it.  
    
    
                                                                                                        
19. Find something to LAUGH about everyday.                                                                                     "If you laugh a lot when you are young then you will get your wrinkles in the right place when you are old."
    
    
                                                                                                                      
20. PRAY every day and THANK God for the life he has given you.   
    
                                                                                                                                                               After all,

    Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.

- Maria Robinson               

These are just a few of the lessons I have learned. Hope you enjoyed reading. Maybe you can share a few more nuggets which you have learned ; as every journey is different from the other and just as interesting!                                                                          

Things a Catholic in India is tired of hearing

Though India has a sizable number of people belonging to different religions, Roman Catholics still remain a minority among the various other minor communities like Jews, Parsis or Sikhs. It is quite a challenge to answer the questions that people have about your way of life and the myriad generalizations that accompany them.

Here is a list of things that being raised as a Roman Catholic in India I have been subjected to (some are drawn from friends' experiences) :

1. Do you eat bread /pork for breakfast everyday?  The Catholics in India have been referred time and again as PAO (which is a slang term). It is generally thought that the only item that we eat is bread(pao) with different kinds of meat.                                                                            FACT - No. Catholics do not necessarily eat meat especially pork all the time. We do consume vegetables on a daily basis and yes, we do patronize chapatis and rotis hugely as part of our daily diet and it doesn't make me any less Catholic.                                                                                                                   
   
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           
2. You must be from Goa if you are Catholic.                                                                           FACT :No not all Catholics come from Goa. In fact Christianity was introduced to India through the southern state of Kerala by St. Thomas and the state has a sizable Catholic population.                                                                                                                                                      
   
                                                                                                                                                                                               
3. You must be a drunkard.                                                                                                            FACT :Not all Catholics are drunkards a trait which has been popularized by Bollywood to the extent that it is thought that we are introduced to alcohol in our cradles. It is a personal choice for everyone as much as it for people belonging to any other religion.                                                                                
   
                                                                                                                                                                                          
4. You must be from a convent school.                                                                                     FACT :Though convent schools are regarded as the highest form of education, there are many schools which provide the same quality education and many of us have been educated there.                                                                                                                                                  
   
5. English is your mother tongue.                                                                                                 FACT : No. English can't be our mother tongue because we like any other Indian belong to this country and have picked one of the many languages of this country.                                                                   
   
6. You must be watching only Hollywood movies and listening to English songs.                                                                                                                           FACT :We like many other Indians watch Bollywood movies and can sing Hindi songs like anyone else.                                                                                                                                                                                           
7. Friends wishing you on Good Friday and asking you "what is good about Good Friday?"                                                                                                        FACT : Let me break it up for you. Good Friday is named so as it is observed as a day of fasting and penance and hence, the name which is translated as holy.                                                              
8. You must we wearing only dresses and jeans and not any Indian wear (read sari and salwar kameez)                                                                                                 FACT : My mother has been wearing a sari ever since I have seen her and is not very comfortable in Western wear. I do possess many pairs of salwar kameez and make no qualms about wearing them (though comfort comes first and I would pick a pair of jeans and a t shirt over anything else in the world)                                                                                                                                            
   
9. You have to be good at football and not any other sport.                                                           FACT :We like and enjoy cricket as much as a game of tennis or football or snooker for that matter. Sports is again a personal choice and in a cricket crazy country like India there are many of us who would rather cheer for Sachin Tendulkar than for Cristiano Ronaldo.                                                                                                                                                    
   
10. You must be good at singing and playing at least one musical instrument (read guitar) .                                                                                                                    FACT : Most of us do sing in the church as a form of prayer and not because we are inherently good at it. Some of us may pick up learning an instrument in the church as we are interested in it and not because we are a prodigy of Beethoven.                                                                                                                
    

I am sure there must be many other stereotypes we are subjected to, which I may have not touched upon. Feel free to comment and let me know of any other generalizations that I may have missed out.